Høvdinger (2015) Reviews

• Embarrassingly bad!

  NorManWithThePlan742016-01-01

  I've been interested in this film for a long time, an independent gangster film from the Oslo underworld sounded like a fresh idea for sure. And even though reading the lukewarm to negative reviews of this film in various Norwegian newspapers, I thought it couldn't be that bad. I was wrong. It was way worse! I don't even know where to begin. This film is so shockingly bad it was often unintentionally comical and at times painfully embarrassing. Almost every line seems like they where written by a prepuberal film-school reject. The story completely lacks development towards the next scenes, often it seems like the plot unfolds at random. The characters are one-dimensional rip-offs from every other gangster film-clichés out there, and then even then some. Leading actor Anderz Eide is clearly the only person in front of the camera who can act. Norwegian audiences will however ponder the fact that he sports a west-coast dialect, while his character is supposedly a bona fide Oslonian. His mother and brother however has the Oslo dialect, but strangely he does not. This is also never commented upon or explained during the film. In this movie, West Ham ex-footballer John Carew is probably the most miscasted person in the history of cinema. While I understand casting him for promotional purposes, one have to wonder what went trough the head of the director when he decided to cast a man with Gambian decent as a Russian mobster. While his appearance is intimidating, he does not look Russian. Nor does he sound Russian. His lines are delivered with a strong Norwegian accent and made me cringe and laugh in equal measures. His introduction scene has him in the standard nightclub scene where he is being fellated while gazing unenthusiastically in the distance sets the tone for the whole film: It's cheesy. It's tasteless. And it's unintentionally hilarious. Director/writer/producer Irasj Asanti had to include himself in the main-cast as well, and does his best to look like a stone cold gangster with attitude. Wearing a ridiculous wig and fake mustache does not cover up his insecurities that shines trough on the screen. Some of the Albanian guys looks good, but they also suffer from the poorly written lines they have to deliver. The action scenes are also a thing that are not up to standard. Shootings with awful cgi muzzle-flashes and blood, and fight- sequences that are so badly choreographed that you only wish them to end. And not in a good way. Some very cheap sounding sound effects are added to the gunshots, punches and kicks, just adding to the awkwardness of it all. The only person involved in this film is the camera operator. There are some pretty decent shots, but that does not help. The script, the acting, the dialog, the action - it will be a long while until someone make something equally bad.

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