Cannibals and Carpet Fitters (2017) Reviews

• Carpet fitting is dirty work, but someone has to do it!

  Coventry2018-04-16

  My hobby of writing user-comments is made significantly easier when a film's title and the entire plot synopsis are identical! This film is about a cannibalistic family clan versus two minivans of carpet fitting colleagues, and there's not a whole lot I can add to that. The cannibal camp exists of five hillbilly baboon-brothers, including a Jason Statham lookalike and a guy with a goofy 80s mullet, and as usual the mother is even more deranged than the boys. The carpet fitters are four dim-witted guys and one tough babe, but their chances are next to none in the ancient country mansion full of subterranean tunnels and human meat pie recipes. Luckily, I watched "Cannibals and Carpet Fitters" at 3am in the morning at a chock-full theater during the Brussels International Fantastic Film Festival. If it weren't for the stimulating ambiance during the annual horror-night, I probably would have been a lot less tolerant regarding the unoriginal plot and the clichéd nature & behavior of the villainous cannibal family. The bloodshed & gore is plentiful and overall satisfying (although the axe head-splitting scene at the very beginning of the film is never topped) and you gradually even develop some sympathy for the lead characters, notably for the duo Colin and Dean. This is the first full-length film of director James Bushe after a handful of interesting looking shorts. He definitely has the potential to become a good genre director, but then he'll have to put a bit more effort and depth into the scripts.

• Not bad

  javier19762018-12-15

  Not bad at all. I expected something cheap and lame but it is pretty decent, it´s no masterpiece or new cult classic, but it´s pretty entertaining, the performances are just fine and most of the gore/kills are really well done, which rather surprised me since this must have had a rather low budget. The only real negative for me is that I couldn´t always understand what they were saying due to their accent, but that´s more my failing than the movie´s.

• Bloody brilliance!

  FrancescaLWhite2017-11-10

  'Cannibals & Carpet Fitters' by James Bushe & Richard Lee O'Donnell is utterly hilarious, wonderfully unpredictable & overall bloody brilliant! I'd pitch it as 'Home Alone' for Adults meets 'Shaun of the Dead'. From the first head splitting at the dinner table to the village cannibal encounter the film has you wholly absorbed. While it deals with certain overly used horror tropes it still managed to surprise and crack me up with laughter. Quality performances, quality writing, quality cinematography & score; if you watched this without knowing it's an independent film you would never be able to guess it, what they achieve on a relatively low budget is mind-blowing. Comedy horror genius!

• Going somewhere

  matbed2019-01-24

  I was intrigued by the title and being in the building trade myself felt drawn to the film, I'm glad I did. This is a really good film,it starts in a bit of a found footage style, which leads really well then into the main story (reminded me a little of the intros to 'ash vs the evil dead' series) The carpet fitters are contracted to fit carpets in a big country house where cannibals live. There isn't much I disliked about the film the kills and effects are good, editing and direction is excellent little things like cutting back to the apprentice Malcolm messing about in the van but it sets him up in a place for the story. It's well written the comedy works, funny lines and some slapstick, but always a bit of gore or peril in between. I've watched it about five times now and it gets funnier the more you watch, you pick up on more facial expressions, and quips. One of my favourite bits is when dean and Malcolm are greeted at the door by mrs hanning and dean says 'going somewhere ' it makes me laugh every time. Very watchable.

• definately not an x-mas movie, more a must see movie.

  ops-525352018-12-12

  Slasher comedy!!?? well how ironic i may sound , youll have a brilliant example in this little british flick. a thin story,buty the acting and the figures are just hillariously well done,and youll get full credit for your money , if....you can live through the stash of slash and blood splattered over all the new lain carpets. there are suspense from beginning to end, the jolts of surprise comes even though you know itll come.. technically its among the best ive seen in the horror genre lately.the special effects are great,editing and filming good,the set design excellent. its also filled with strong rural english language and humour , so if youre able to take the blood its highly recommended.