Aliens vs. Avatars (2011) Reviews

• Undefinable load of manure

  denieuwehoorspelers2011-11-27

  Unfortunately, zero or a minus number of stars are not allowed, because even one star is already too much credit for this undefinable load of manure. Plan nine from outer space is Oscar material in comparison to this waste of time. Is it really that bad, you might ask. No, it's even worse. The acting is awful. The script is awful. The costumes are even worse. A teenager with a moderate computer could make better effects. It looks like someone decided to make a film without any budget at all. The result is as can be expected. Just five minutes into the film, i already knew it was bad. Instead of switching it off, i kept watching it, hoping it would improve. A dreadful mistake on my part. It didn't get better, it got worse. Save yourself a lot of wasted time and don't bother watching it. You'll be a lot better off. The only advantage of watching more than an hour of this garbage is that bad films such as Plan nine from outer space or Starcrash seem to have become a lot more watchable than before.

• How many ways to say rubbish?

  Netjer-y-khet2011-11-30

  Bad, crummy, lousy, bilge, garbage, hogwash, and still there isn't a single word in the English language to describe this badly-acted tripe. Mumbling, squeaks, squeals, blank stares and stupid grins are passed off as dialog. The *cough* "actors" outdo Pinocchio in the wooden acting stakes. I give this waste of an otherwise perfectly good blank DVD 1/10. If not for the bizarre record attempt to get bare breasts, gross misogyny, references to incest, a person attacked by an alien, a muscled, slow-talking jock professing to be the best friend of a weakling Übergeek, lewd suggestions, virginity-fixation and sexism into the first ten minutes, it would have scored half out of ten. The half being given to the director for having the nerve to actually publish this offal. If, within fifteen minutes of commencing to view, you don't get the urge to bleach your brain to a crisp or don't feel like running around in demented circles, beating yourself upside the skull with a heavy bat, then please, seek immediate psychiatric intervention.

• Too easy a target...

  camera-shy2011-11-26

  I could be mean and rip this film a new one but as my title says its just too easy a target so i won't bother. Instead i'll just say well done for having a go at filmmaking but i think you all need to work on your skills both as filmmakers and actors. It looks like it was shot on one of those low end DV or HDV pro-sumer cams and the costumes were made out of egg crates and old toilet roll although they did make me laugh so there was a silver lining. I'd be remiss as a reviewer not to warn people that this is a very low low ...low low budget film and you should enter into it with expectations to suit said budget ...low. Peace.

• This is a joke right?

  carsten-358-284872012-05-01

  I was invited to watch this movie with a friend of mine. We both love Aliens and Avatar movies, so here might be the perfect combination. Unfortunately it turned out to be more like a hangover or perhaps someone used to produce XXX-rated movies who have made this. I am not sure if its a serious production or just some school project that was made to see how many IMDb users would tilt about it. I hadn't heard of this movie until my friend invited me and after watching 50% of it (zapping through the rest) - I guess we know why it never showed up in any cinemas. No one would pay to watch this movie in a cinema. The special effects looks like something made with AfterEffects in 2002 and the actors (if they are at all) are so bad I for a start thought this was going to be a soft-porn movie. The "alien/avatar" parts are - well, looks like it was made as a school project. If its just a school project, they can be "okay" proud with it, but don't waste your time on this if you like Sci-Fi. There is NOTHING in this movie worth watching - well except a half nude scene, aha! so it WAS a soft-porn movie or?

• Terrible or Awesome ?!! It all depends on how you look at it !

  javad-arbabi2011-12-01

  How can anybody make such a terrible sci-fi movie ?! You can't possibly imagine it to be any worse . This movie just achieved the highest level of sucking in whatever aspect imaginable ! In fact it is so terribly bad that makes you think it's made by the greatest mind of 21th century ! And you ask why is that ? Paying attention to every little Sucky detail and making it suck even more is not something ordinary men can do , it needs a genius man, getting help from a genius crew, doing a lot of thinking and hard work . So if this was the goal of the staff of the movie(sucking as much as possible in 70 minutes), then I should say they achieved it perfectly, no hesitation whatsoever ! Considering this fact we can say : DIRECTING : Simply brilliant ---ACTING : Marginally the best acting possible to mankind ---VISUAL EFFECTS : OMG! I am sure they found real Aliens and Avatars, made them furious of each other somehow,started filming their war,got caught in the middle,survived the war,edited the valuable footage and rolled it out as a movie ,cause otherwise how could everything in the movie be so real !!!!!!!! All the above aside , I think if you watch this movie as a comedy everything starts to change ! Then it's definitely a astonishing comedy with lots of laugh and fun !