Watch If You Dare (2018) Reviews

• Oh Myyyyyy

  arfdawg-12019-01-13

  You can travel far and wide. You can attend every obscure film event. Every movie conference. Every screening of every movie ever made on this planet and planets yet to be discovered. But honestly, you will not find a worse movie ever made. Honestly.

• Shakepeare would be jealous of how much of a tragedy this "movie" is.

  Futures_End2018-12-02

  "Watch If You Dare" is a pathetic excuse of a horror movie that neither comes off as taking itself seriously or self-aware. What it does in its terrible 4 stories is showcase gore and pass it off as horror while completely missing the mark on what horror actually is. I felt so offended by this trash I felt inclined to write a review about it. The first story is called 'The Stylist' and makes absolutely no sense. It doesn't explain anything about anyone or the scenario and falls into replacing any sort of suspense or intrigue with blood, rubbing into the face of the audience screaming "ISN'T THIS SCARY?!" The second story 'Ink' is somehow even more bland, boring and nonsensical making you ask questions (if you've somehow stayed awake), but not the good kind. It makes you think who decided this was good enough not only to write, but to pitch, produce, direct and release. It doesn't tell you a story before throwing you into their cheap gore special effects that would take you out of the movie even though this doesn't have you in it in the first place. The third story 'Foodies' is PAINFULLY long and one of the worst of the already utterly terrible anthology. The characters are painful to watch creating a boring viewing experience without gripping its viewers or creating any product worth watching. Frankly I can't think of anything more to say about this boring, boring short. It's BORING. Finally 'Knob Goblins' felt like 4 seconds which is a refreshing change of pace because it meant this nightmare was over quickly. I actually have no idea what I watched but I thought it was funny in an extremely awkward way. This has no purpose of anything. Overall "Watch If You Dare" is only called this because it challenges you to sit through too many minutes of terrible storytelling, directing and acting. Watch if you hate yourself.

• If the title dares you to watch it, you have all you need to know

  tdrish2018-12-09

  Seriously, are you expecting a good movie with a title like this? This is an anthology of short nonsense horror imagery. There's nothing here that even tells a story, so I cannot go out of my way to even describe this as horror anthology. The movie opens up with "The Stylist." To sum this short up, a woman is complaining while her hair is getting cut about how she's going to act in front of her boss at a party. Her friend, cutting her hair, decides to graphically remove her entire hair from her scalp, and put it on her own. Why? That's never explained. I guess we're suppose to assume she's going to try to go to the party acting as if she were her, wearing her hair like a wig? Still want to watch more? Next story is "Ink". It's about a guy going around removing tattoo's from peoples bodies. Skin and all, and then he cuts his own skin off, and places the tattoo skin on his own body. First of all, if you want the tattoo, you could just get your own, instead of going around hurting people for your wants. I hope the cops catch this air-hole in time. ( Spoiler: They don't!) I won't even bother describing the last two segments, because 90 percent of you aren't even going to make it that far, all I can say is one is really short, the other is really long, and they're both really boring, so there's your summary of Watch If You Dare. A movie that makes me wish that some of my material could be put on film, because I know DAMN well what I write is better this then garbage!

• What a terrible movie

  aidansmama772019-04-28

  I can now say that I have truly watched the worst movie ever made.

• Watch if you can

  Fortressofdoors2019-03-04

  It doesn't get much worse than this. There t is, the shortest review I've ever written.