The Row (2018) Reviews

• Not a masterpiece

  schaltinjessica2018-07-27

  So cliché (girl goes to university and wants to join a sorority, overbearing cop dad is having a hard time letting her go, people are being killed on campus, stories merge, you can predict where it's gonna go from there ...). Bad acting, bad editing, bad soundtrack... Just don't bother.

• Horrible

  solidabs2019-01-30

  I thought Randy Couture this oughta be funny. God this was awful. That Lala is the worst actress I've ever seen. I was like who the hell would hire her to act. Then I saw that her boyfriend is a producer on this film. Too funny. God what a wreck.

• Don't waste your time.

  Slasher_Guy2018-07-27

  'The Row' (2018) had a lot of potential to be a fun B-grade slasher film, but instead chose to be two very different films: a laughably bad direct-to-video cop thriller with Randy Couture, and a sloppy slasher film with Instagram bimbos getting whacked by a knife-wielding killer. Acting is somewhat OK from the cast and the killer looked pretty creepy on-screen, but the rest of the film is pretty much woeful due to the terrible script. I know it's a slasher movie, but some of the stuff here was just so, so bad. And what's with having no chase scenes? Come on, people. Funniest part of the film had to be the female police chief who looked like a she'd just finished working it on a pole. I'd laugh if wasn't so stupid. I'd suggest you watch Sorority Row (2009) or just browse Netflix for something decent. This movie is trash.

• Don't waste your money...

  mcooper-428332018-07-30

  I was hoping for more but was let down. Turned the movie off before it was over due to the shaky camera and poor story line. Teen girls running around half naked, drunk and druged out with a few SHORT scenes of murder which only lasted a couple of seconds each sums up this awful movie. I love Vanderpump Rules but LALA KENT acting was dull and not what I would expect after watching her on the show.

• MTV mashup...

  tattoopig2018-07-27

  Murders are happening on campus and a freshman discovers "dark secrets" about the sorority she's pledging...and at 17mins in you will easily guess who the killer is. The headache-inducing editing and cringe-worthy acting make this a must-see for masochists and those who like their eyes to bleed. I've seen better quality films shot on an iPhone. The director is obviously going for a hip, happening kind of style that will cater to the dumbed down teenage market. The only problem is that even the teenage market expects more than this trite trash. Perhaps some naked boobs would have helped here, but even that is denied the discerning viewer (can't show naked boobies to under 14's!) Seriously though, this film is just a mess from start to finish. I've seen scarier Slipknot videos!