SPF-18 (2017) Reviews

• DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME

  laurenargento2018-08-25

  I watched this movie just to see Noah Centineo's perfect face and beautiful eyes but I was then met with the worst movie to ever exist. First of all the movie made no sense, there was like 6 different plot lines and I truly didn't understand any of the relationships. The acting sucked and the only good thing was the view of the beach. Also the movie just made no sense all around and I would NEVER recommend this to a friend, this movie should just be deleted from everywhere. However I still love you Noah.

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• Worst movie ever!

  angeltriplett412018-06-09

  I'm pretty sure this movie was written by a 13 year old girl with rich parents who could bank roll the entire thing. The parents must have some horrible dirt on Keanu, Goldie Hawn and Rosanna Arquette in order to get them to be in this huge pile of garbage. The whole thing made me angry and I don't even know who to be most angry at the writers, director or the poor unfortunate souls who had to perform in this train wreck.

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• The worst film ever made. And I wish I was kidding.

  Kandiman2017-11-01

  Dear all who love film, Drop whatever you're doing and watch this film on Netflix right now, because this is the new shorthand for "worst film ever made" and it's so bad that it has to be seen to be believed. Let me give you the "kind" version of my review. Let's start with the writing. The writing on this movie is so bad that I'm not entirely convinced it was written at all. I think it may have been vomited onto the page. This is essentially what happens if you get really, really stoned, write a thesis on existentialism whilst watching the OC then decide to adapt it into a screenplay and subsequent movie having consumed your body weight in acid on every day of the process. I mean, it's just terrible. In fact, this is an analogy that screenwriters will understand that demonstrates how bad the dialogue is: You know when you're struggling with a scene so you just drop in some placeholder dialogue to come back to and fix later? This is what happens when you don't go back and do that. Now the acting. I'm using the word "acting" so charitably here that it physically pains me. I have never, in all my life, witnessed anything quite so terrible as the acting in this film. I mean, some of the lead actors would struggle to get a callback for a kindergarten nativity play. I'm surprised that they could get insured to make this movie... you'd think it'd be dangerous putting this much wood under studio lights. Honestly, it just needed a couple of squirrels and we could've replaced the nonsensical voice-over with David Attenborough narrating and improved the movie a thousandfold. And, somehow, Molly Ringwald pops up in it. If she's getting that hard up for cash, can we please start a Kickstarter rather than let her humiliate herself like this again? And, as if the director was painfully aware that the level of acting in this was bad, in an almost way too ironic act of definitely unintentional parody, there are cameos from Keanu Reeves and Pamela Anderson. Seriously. I couldn't make this up. Oh, and the directing? Awful. Like, the worst student film-level bad. Every single choice is wrong. Every single one. There's footage used, shot on a camcorder by one of the actresses, that is the only footage in the entire movie that is framed in any way correctly. The entire movie looks like the camera operator did his job whilst sitting on a pneumatic drill in an earthquake except for the camcorder footage. Ladies and gentleman, I submit to you that we no longer need to discuss Plan 9 as the worst piece of cinema ever. SPF18, quite frankly, makes it look like Citizen Kane. Although, because I want to end on at least one positive, I'll give it this: That soundtrack is absolutely incredible. Like, every great song from the 80s appears at some point. It doesn't make sense for them to be there, but they are...

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• It was not the actors that made the movie bad, it was the movie itself .

  vanessamendoza-769262018-01-19

  Yes the movie was bad, maybe some of these comments are a bit exaggerated, but the movie wasn't great.. let's be real. I'm snowed In, it's 2am , I need a good movie to watch. And this movie pops up in my recommendations every day.! So I was like oh what the heck noah's Cute ass is on the movie cover. Why not .? The movie starts ... the intro is already very long... unecessary. Fast forward the movie proceeds. The acting wasn't great. BUT.!!! We CANNOT blame the actors . Apart from this movie , these actors and actresses have acted in different projects .. and they were great. They were amazing.. Noah and Bianca .. both acted on the hit tv show "The Fosters" . They were great. So maybe it wasn't the acting . These actors and actresses were not exposed to their full potential, the script was CRINGE within itself . You know when you look really good, and you know you look good, but in order to take a good picture , Of course you need a good angle . You can't simply just take a good picture at a really bad angle with trash lighting, with your double chin exposed, and your face overshadowed. The whole movie was just a bad angle for these young actors. The script ,the plot, the wardrobe, the camera work. Everything .

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• I clapped when I saw Keanu Reeves

  luizuc2018-09-07

  Before tonight, I thought Netflix only made mediocre movies. I was definitely wrong: this is anything but mediocre. It has been a time since I last accidentally saw something like this. Absolutely breathtaking. It's everything we all really want: we get to know all there is to know about the characters after they are 30 sec in screen, basically no real development, a pletora of pointless subplots, the happiest happy-end of all time: it's perfect! I recommend it to anyone searching for an intense and jaw-dropping movie. It made me feel physical pain for the first time since I inadvertently saw Foodfight on cable TV at 4 AM a few years ago. Now, the unbelievably rich plot: 1) There is a girl. Her (only) traits: i) She likes to film stuff; ii) She is angry with her mother for some reason; iii) She is still a virgin; iv) She has a boyfriend with a dead father (he only became her boyfriend due to the death of the father). 2) The boyfriend's traits are: i) His father is dead; ii) He is sooo saaad; iii) For some reason, Keanu Reeves (yeah, Keanu Reeves - not some Keanu Reeves' character: Keanu Reeves as Keanu Reeves) ask him to take care of his beach-house in Malibu. He invites his girlfriend to stay with him in Keanu Reeves' beach-house. 3) The girl has a cousin. She is a joy to watch: the actress looks like she has eaten to much sugar. *** all the actors are terrible, but terrible in an almost charming way - its not their fault, though, they had to deal with a terrible director and a bizarre script. *** The girl invites her cousin to help herself get laid. Best character in the movie! 4) There is a country music musician. His introduction scene is certainly in my TOP 10 ANIME ENTRANCES OF ALL TIME. He is a friend of the girl's boyfriend and definitely a true sad-boy. 5) There is a lifeguard who firstly tries to arrest the musician for sleeping in a public beach, than, after a discourse made by the cousin ("California's a concept. It's a way of saying 'We're not Nevada, and thank God for that.'"), he becomes their best friend and (apparently) starts living whit them in Keanu Reeves' beach-house. Oh, and we also find out he was the apprentice of the boy's surfer dead dad. 6) The entire movie spans less than 72h, but they all manage to sort up all their lives without really changing anything other than who-is-kissing-who. 7) Apparently, 16k views on youtube is enough to totally change a music producer's mind. 8) There are MANY pointless and readily solved subplots. 9) The lucid dream sequence is simply b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l. 10) I clapped when I saw Keanu Reeves.

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